Morning Positivity Primer

SPEAKER_01 0:05

Don't discredit the strategy before you try it. And just every morning, because the the brain seeks patterns. Make a positive pattern ritual every morning. And believe me, you'll soon just do that because when we feel good, we want to continue that. And that's the way to do it. Start the day off on a good note. And yes, I understand negative things happen, bad things happen. I get that. But it's how we manage it. Try to manage things with more positive energy than negative energy.

Meet The Host And Guest

SPEAKER_00 0:47

Hi friends, this is Read and Write with Natasha Podcast. My name is Natasha Tines, and I'm an author and a journalist. In this channel, I talk about the writing life, review books, and interview authors. Hope you enjoy the journal. Hi everyone, and welcome to another episode of Read and Write with Natasha. I'm very happy today to have with me author Deborah Malo, who is a motivational speaker, success coach, and author of the upcoming book Six Steps to Fewer Days That Suck. Known for helping people turn negative habits into positive ones. She's a former top-ranked biotech sales rep with a background in design. She now empowers audience through her daily decision method and Positive Energy Club to enjoy more, worry less, and find the sunshine. Hi Devra, so nice to have you on the podcast. And I love the sun on your head.

SPEAKER_01 1:53

Thank you, Natasha. I'm so excited to be here. And as I start every podcast, I want everyone to give themselves a big hug. Because when we appreciate ourselves, we do better.

SPEAKER_00 2:06

Yeah, I need that this morning. So, Deborah, you have a fascinating story. I mean, you were

Burnout And The Subway Turning Point

SPEAKER_00 2:13

into biotech sales rep and you know, with a background in design, and now you decided to help people be more positive, and you just wrote a book about it. So, what made the shift?

SPEAKER_01 2:27

I made the shift because I was burnt out trying to be number one sales rep at JJ, and I did in my franchise over and over and over again. But I exhausted myself competing with myself to maintain that number one. And I missed the creative process. I was always, I'm always creative because I be, I believe being creative is problem solving and coming up with new ways to do things and not feeling stuck. But I was feeling stuck in my everyday, pushing, pushing, pushing, and not taking care of myself. And I just thought there had to be a better way to enjoy more, worry less, and have more fun in my life because I lost the fun, as so many of us do being on a hamster wheel. So one day on a New York City subway platform, because I am a New Yorker, I just had it. I said to myself, if I don't make a change, nothing will. And I started to write this guidebook. No desire to put it out into the world. It was really to fix myself. I asked questions of myself. I came up with solutions and strategies and different ways to approach, making life easier for myself, enjoying myself more and being present in the moment. And I came, I read stories about different people. I read a lot of science and why our brains work a certain way, ways to trigger endorphins and feel better about myself. It was really important. Tips and I had lined pages where I wrote notes. The thing was this thick. And then friends looked at it because they noticed my shift and they said, you really should share this because the human struggle, everybody has that. Everybody has imposter syndrome. Everybody, well, not everybody, but so many people want to get out of their daily rut, but they just don't have the energy to do it, or they have or there's fear, worry, our life problems, family, all the excuses. We can give 101 excuses and stop us from doing something. But if you really want something, I believe you can achieve it. It's just a matter of making the decision that we're going to do it.

From Guidebook To Shareable Framework

SPEAKER_01 4:52

So that's how six steps to fewer days that suck was born, and my website, The Daily Decisions, because unless we make these daily decisions, Natasha, and we focus on them and put them into practice and believe in ourselves enough to do it, nothing happens. The days, the years, they melt into many years.

Daily Decisions And Self-Care

SPEAKER_00 5:15

What are the daily decisions that you think we should focus on?

SPEAKER_01 5:20

I believe that we all have our dreams, we all have things that we yearn for. So many times we believe we can't do it, or people discourage us. And I think it's so important to do things that are you're passionate about that give you, give us a sense of purpose. And figuring that out, making your lists. I believe in lists, short lists, not long lists, not overwhelming ourselves. No, no, no. But I make lists, I post them, I adjust them. And I think that that's part of the decisions. The other thing is self-care and self-worth and believing in ourselves. I think self-care is more about building confidence, resilience, the things that foster inner peace and actually help us on our journey, not things that that take away from our journey, not things that detract from it, not negative people because they don't serve us. And I make a conscious effort every day to make decisions that actually push me forward rather than hold me back. And I think if everybody stopped and reflected before reacting and thinking about what's going to serve them best, and that's not being selfish, because if we are not at our best, we can't be our best for other people. So get that guilt and selfish feeling off your minds because that's far from the truth. Take care of yourself, value yourself, have dignity, and enjoy your life because it could be over tomorrow, like that. And I hate to be that way, but it's really true. I've seen it. I saw it in my friend, friend's husband. I mean, you just never know. So we owe it to ourselves to enjoy or at least try to enjoy, even in challenging moments, find ways to make things better.

SPEAKER_00 7:33

So, what are the steps that we should take so that our days won't suck?

The Six-Step Method Overview

SPEAKER_01 7:39

Well, I broke it down in a certain way because my book, as you know, I sent you a PDF, is double pages. It's all the things, because this is how I had to figure out how I was going to change, walk away from negativity, no more excuses. I have about procrastination, I have about gratitude, all the things that we all face every day. So they're double pages that, as I mentioned, ask questions, give solutions, stories, tips, mantras, all of that. So I started with the first thing making the decision. Because honestly, unless we decide, the days just keep circling. Life just happens. I don't want to live a life by default. I say that. I want to live a life that has meaning to me, not meaning to someone else. I want to believe that what I want to actually achieve, I can work towards. And then the next step is ditch bad habits because we have to be aware of the things that make us go down a rabbit hole, like worrying and fear and negativity and other people's problems and all the things. I am a good friend, but I I'll try to be true to myself. So the great thing is our brains love to make our brains seek patterns. So if we focus on making positive patterns, that's what we will achieve. And understanding that, understanding negativity bias, and then our brains favor the negative events information over positive, but we control our thoughts and actions, understanding all of that gives us pause to be able to stop ourselves from going down rabbit holes. So that's ditch bad habits. And then the third one is the mindset. Our mindset, feed it with bravery. That's what I say, not fear. We need to be courageous, we need to believe in ourselves. That doesn't mean not listening to what other people have to say, if they have your best interest at heart. I'm very flexible and open. But again, we have to trust our intuition that if we believe something, that we have faith enough in ourselves to go ahead and do it. That's why I love reading stories about people who actually accomplish their dreams because they had the faith, even when 101 people told them no, they went ahead. And then the fourth, the fourth is the action. Gotta take action and make it happen. Work towards it, but work towards it smartly. Balance is very important. Harmony in one's life is very important. And it's never gonna be perfect. Life is messy, and we have to give ourselves permission to accept that and to accept ourselves and know that it's not going to be perfect. And if a mistake happens, move forward. I don't like the word failure, I call it education and growth. I've renamed it. I don't call failure failure. Failure. I call it education and growth. And then the sixth is the the fifth, I'm sorry, the fifth is the at whoops, there goes the the sunshine grind. The fifth is the attitude, because it's our attitude also that could set us free. If we have a positive attitude, if we believe in ourselves, we are who we think we are. If you think you're wonderful, that's what you're going to project to the world. If you think you're less than, that's what you put out there too. So why? You know, the old saying, you fake it till you make it. Well, I believe that we all have our gifts. Focus on your strengths. Don't focus on what you're not good at. Enjoy yourself. Enjoy the people around you. Be present in the moment. And then the sixth is making the commitment. So it's the commitment. We have to, you make the decision, and at the end you commit to it and you keep going. And some things won't work out the way we want it to, but I believe it works out for the best. I believe we are led to where we should be. And if some people don't believe that, that's okay. But uh, I truly believe it, and I've seen that in my pretty long life.

SPEAKER_00 12:09

Thank you very much for for sharing uh this ray of sunshine. And so I'm I'm curious about your writing and publishing process. Of course.

Design-Driven Book Format

SPEAKER_00 12:21

So, first you said that you have and I saw the book, you have a different format, uh, a unique format. So, can you tell us a bit about the format of the book and why did you choose that format?

SPEAKER_01 12:32

Absolutely, absolutely, because it's we we know this is the book. Now that we have everything, you can read it, and and this starts as a step, and then every whoops, there's a long page at the end. Yeah, but but everything is a double page of so I'm a designer. My background is art, even though I was a pharma sales rep, I believe everything that we do in life contributes and to the person we are and gives us tools. And I'm so grateful for everything that I've done uh and exploring and being adventurous and not necessarily listening to people who said no, because I've been told no since I was 10 years old. The eye doctor told me the ophthalmologist told me I couldn't put in contacts because I wasn't because I was, I guess, nervous or something. Well, really? Like, let's be positive here. So my whole life I've been told no, but you know what? I managed to make it make it work. So I laid out the book in a certain way because I am not a believer in personal growth books. For me, I'm not downing. I read all kinds and I love all kinds of books, but for me, I didn't want graphs and charts. I didn't want anything complicated. I really wanted instant gratification. I wanted to get to the solution so that I could do it. Because remember, I wrote this for me. This was my guidebook to improve my life, and it works, and it works for the people that I coach too. So I have I have cred. It works. So, anyhow, I wrote it in a certain way. It starts with a title on the double page, and like no more excuses, and then there's the commitment, a little thing, and then before the commitment, there's a little quote, everything in sound bites, everything quick, things, visuals to remember, then there's questions, then there's some solutions, a mantra, the little stories, and the then the the three tips, and those three tips turn out to be 10 tips with a summary at the end of the step. And I did that because in this world of Instagram and social media, TikTok, people are used to scrolling. People want fast, fast, fast. So I did the book to be able to give people a way to get a solution, to get an answer really quickly. And that's exactly why I laid it out the way I did. There's a visual with a clock that's a start now, which is an activity on each double page. I just wanted, I just know people work best when they have little snippets to remember, like revision is a decision, quench your desires, thirst, don't water it down. You know, different things that I say, sound bias. And I know people remember those things, and then they'll stop and pause, and they'll say, okay, I'm not going down that rabbit hole. I can accomplish this. And that's what I wanted to give to everybody was an easy way to fix whatever the problem was so that you can enjoy today more than being miserable because I want people to be unstuck. I'm doing this now, really, in my life. I want to pay it forward. I want to help as many people as I can to enjoy their life and not feel stuck. It's my passion and it's from my heart. It's true.

SPEAKER_00 16:10

Huh, I I I love it. And actually, this got me thinking have you thought of converting this into a video format?

Short-Form Content And Outreach

SPEAKER_00 16:18

Like you talk about short snippets, and it got me thinking of like Instagram reels or YouTube shorts where and you're a very good, I mean, you're a speaker, you're a professional speaker. If if you actually turn this into like uh an Instagram series of Instagram reels to complement the book, I I think that would work really well. Uh, have have you thought about this?

SPEAKER_01 16:43

I actually have, and that's what I'm working on now. It's actually morning motivation snippets with with one of my fabulous mugs. I have so many mugs like hello sunshine and smile like in back of me. Well, you can't see it here. But I actually have, and actually, what I am starting to do is walk around New York City with my sunshine crown and talk to people about positive energy, also. So I am definitely doing that. And I would love to share that with you. We could do follow-ups together because you're gonna come visit. Maybe I'll get to see you when you come to Manhattan soon, too. Because I I definitely am doing all of that. I try not to overwhelm myself, got through the book process, which was definitely challenging because unless it resonates with me and I feel it's the best I can do, not perfectionistic exactly, but if I don't think it's the best I can do, I can't put it out to the world. So it took a little longer. Three editors, four editors, excuse me, and a big process behind getting this book out there. And I, as you know, I self-published because I started to look for agents and so I could get into the big five publishing houses, and then I sent to, when that didn't happen, then I sent to the smaller publishers, and something told me in my gut, just do it. So I didn't, it's not just going to be on Amazon. I did it also with Ingram Spark. Yeah, I have my own ISBNs,

Self-Publishing Path And Team

SPEAKER_01 18:18

I have my own QR codes in my book. I have links to my website. I have a QR code to go to my website. I really thought about all the ways that I could get it out there. And my goal is to sell this more in bigger bulk, what they call bulk sales, and help corporations, help different groups be able to have people working there that are happy. Because so many people are just not happy. They just go through the motions every day, and I see it, and it makes me sad, but I understand because I did that. I did that for a lot of years because we have to put food on the table, we maybe don't we're not able to necessarily go ahead and work on books. We have to work every day, and then you have a family, and everything takes time. So it's just a matter of figuring it out and not overwhelming yourself because, as I said earlier, if you try to do too much at once, nothing gets done, and then the stress comes. And I'm a believer in limit stress. I was too stressed out for too many years, never again.

SPEAKER_00 19:35

No, won't do it, won't go there. So you said that you self-published and you worked with a number of editors. So I'm curious about the process of self publishing and how did you gather this team of people that helped you self publish? How did you find them? And what did you need to self publish?

SPEAKER_01 19:57

So, well, I started working with someone book. Why that was a bad choice, but uh I won't say more in case the person listened, but then I knew what I needed to do. I sort of knew Amazon's important, but I also wanted, I didn't want to only be on Amazon. I wanted to have a breath, a different way of like getting it out there. You know, when I speak at events to be able to sell books, there's so many other ways than just selling it on Amazon, Barnes and Noble. I mean, that's great. They're great. I'm I'm thankful that they're there to support us, um, small bookstores and all that. That that's important. But there's also other places to sell it to that, you know, maybe unconventional or not well thought out. So I wanted that option. So it wasn't just to print on Amazon. It was also to uh do it on Ingram. But I understand when you do bulk sales and I'm not there yet, I'll get there. Um, I believe. And and everything sort of falls into a place. It just has my whole life. I just focus on it and I'm very diligent and I'm good at following up. So I understand when you do big runs, you go with these other printers that will do it for a whole lot less. So I'm going to put my book on different other platforms, and if I get those bulk sales, those people will then be able to tell me the printers to use. But I believe I'll figure it all out also, because this is what happened. I know I've heard a lot of people talk about Fiverr and using Fiverr with you, and that's great. They're great people on Fiverr, I'm sure. But I like to work with people that are in the field. So I found the cover designer. This is how everything seems to happen. When I focus on it, you want to call it manifestation, you can. I don't know what to call it, but I'll call it that. Uh I needed to get a cover. So someone in my building, I live in a huge building, over 800 apartments. So somebody I know in my building's best friend was a cover designer who worked at a you at one of the top five publishers. I won't say the name, um, because I don't know if she'd want me to get it out there. So I knew exactly what I wanted the cover to look like, um, since I'm a designer, and my friend and I were sort of coming up with some ideas, and I knew that I wanted, I wanted it, I wanted asymmetrical. I wanted it to have a zipper because I wanted the zipper to, you know, unzip a happier life. So I knew I wanted that, and I knew I wanted bright colors because of sunshine. And so I told, I told the person exactly what I wanted, and I got it. She did it, she did it for Ingram. She didn't know how to do it for Amazon. So then I had to find somebody else. So I found somebody else who actually took it and then laid it out for Amazon because they're both different, they they have different um dimensions. So I did that. And as far as editors, I I just found different people. I mean, they just sort of came into my life at different times when it was needed. And then I was able to, because I had the the actual files from InDesign, because it has it was done in InDesign, the actual layout for the book, because it's laid out in a specific way. I found somebody who then was able to take what the editors did and actually take the files that I had and re-edit and everything, because it was like a process over a year and a half actually fixing things so it was to where I felt it was the best it was, because I didn't want like blocks of text that were past like three or four lines. I wanted things that were quick and easy and not and only said what it needed to say, no more. So it was definitely a process, but it all just seemed to Natasha happen when I needed it to happen. I don't know. That's been my whole life, just

Launch Plans And Physical Format

SPEAKER_01 24:09

like that. I believe that it all happens if we want it to happen, and then I go with the flow because it'll all work out. Something will work out. Why stress? Enjoy the enjoy the journey.

SPEAKER_00 24:21

So you're done with with all the publishing. When will the book come out on Amazon or or other platforms?

SPEAKER_01 24:28

Well, I'm gonna yeah, I'm gonna start getting it out. It's gonna come out in in in in in two weeks' time. Well, by the time you have this out there, it will be out, Natasha. So it's it's gonna be it's gonna be out. And anybody who wants six steps to fewer days and suck. I advise either the paperback or the hardcover because the ebook is challenging because the way the book is laid out, you cannot capture it in an ebook just because of how an ebook is formatted. And ebooks are great, and audiobooks are great, and if that's the only way you can read it, read it. But it's it, but it definitely translates best into a physical book. Yeah, and I'll eventually have a workbook and a coloring book and like different things, you know, it's it's all those things that'll happen because I think six steps to fewer days, it suck. It sort of needs to be a franchise.

SPEAKER_00 26:10

I love that. So you mentioned that the transformation happened to you. You were on the train in Manhattan and you said no more. So, what happened? How did your life change after you wrote that list? Or you started your like you said you were burnt out, and what happened after you said I've had enough? How did your life change?

SPEAKER_01 26:32

Well, I made this the decision to invest in myself and do this. That was that was the transformation. I I stayed, I stayed at um working as a pharma rep for a couple of years afterwards, but I knew that this was the final destination. This was going to be the next chapter, my design chapter, my sales chapter, and now my helping people get unstuck and find the sunshine chapter. That's where I'm at now. And this is the chapter that I I want to continue because I've always been the person that people come to for advice. And even though I'm not trained as a psychiatrist, as a medical

Personal Transformation And Coaching

SPEAKER_01 27:17

doctor, sometimes I believe in all those. Doctors are wonderful. You know, don't get me wrong. I'm I I have praise for them. But I also believe that sometimes somebody that has your best interest at heart, I know doctors do, but sometimes just somebody who's just willing to listen, to be your cheerleader, to be a mentor, to actually sit and come up with strategies to help you understanding your struggles, because we're all different and we each come with different baggage. And I really try to do individual approaches because I'm a very creative person. So I really try to understand where people are coming from and help that each person figure out their what will work best for them. Because what works for you doesn't necessarily work for somebody else.

SPEAKER_00 28:16

Yeah, yeah. So how was your writing process? How long did it take you to finish the book? Um years. Ah, years. Oh wow.

SPEAKER_01 28:26

It started what it started in, it's the initials started in 2017, and then you know, I I did it, and it wasn't written the best way, and then I had I had one editor and another editor, and then another, and you know, so it's just been it's just been a really long process. But through all that, I've learned a lot about social media, I've learned a lot about being able to do things tech-wise. Actually, things have caught up with us. I don't write with AI, but I definitely like run things through for grammar or something, but you know, I don't use it to write because I'm a very creative, I'm as I said, I'm creative and I really like my voice and why I want my voice to be out there. I don't want somebody else's voice out there. I'm very clear, just like I wanted my cover to be a certain way and the layout to be a certain way. I have a vision, and that vision, I just even if whatever works, whatever's meant to be will happen. But I really believe that it's important to listen to your voice, to follow your intuition and see it through that way. Like I said, I believe in listening to other people and suggestions, but I think ultimately we have to believe in ourselves enough to follow what we feel in our gut is the right way. Because usually we're right about that. It's funny how I've re I've wrote about that in my book too, about intuition and everything, because there's really something to be said about it.

SPEAKER_00 30:01

So, Deborah, this has been wonderful. What

Writing Timeline And Voice

SPEAKER_00 30:04

would be your top advice that you would give to someone to have uh a ray of sunshine today? Uh what would the first thing that, like, let's say you're talking to me, one thing that I should do today to make my day like what? It's 11 a.m. now, and if I have, let's say, I go to bed at 10 p.m., something that I should do today that to make sure that today does not suck.

SPEAKER_01 30:32

Well, the first thing is in the morning, this is my practice. I give myself a hug when I wake up and I smile because smiling actually triggers your endorphins. So does laughter, but it's really true. It's telling your heart you that you're it's saying that your heart is at peace when you smile. So I smile because that makes me feel better. And then I say something like, Today I bring the positive energy. I say something positive to myself because our brains tend to go negative if we don't manage it, manage our thoughts. So that's really important. What I also say is it might be raining outside, but it's a party in my mind, it's sunshine in my mind. And I really try, whether your listeners believe it or not, because I was the person that was like, I'd be I'd find the negative way. Of all the fabulous things I did in a day, I focus on the one thing, the two things that didn't meet up to my expectations. And you know what? It's all self-defeating when we do that. So we need to start the day on a positive note because due to cortisol, this is actually the science, due to cortisol, and when we wake up, it just starts, and you have a negative thought, like immediately, not due to yourself, just the way our bodies work. So I try to counter it before anything negative can happen. So just say nice things to I know you already do, Natasha. You're a fabulous person and you have a positive energy, and I feel it. But for anybody, just don't discredit the strategy before you try it. And just every

One Practice To Brighten Your Day

SPEAKER_01 32:26

morning, because the the brain seeks patterns, make a positive pattern ritual every morning. And believe me, you'll soon just do that because when we feel good, we want to continue that, and that's the way to do it. Start the day off on a on a good note. And yes, I understand negative things happen, bad things happen, I get that, but it's how we manage it. Try to manage things with more positive energy than negative energy.

SPEAKER_00 32:59

That's true. And on that note, thank you very much, um, Deborah. This has been very inspiring and very encouraging. And you gave me a ray of sunshine today that I'm gonna take with me until the rest of the day. And I wish you the best of luck with your book that's coming soon. And for anyone who's listening or watching, please uh make sure to check out uh Deborah Mallow's book, uh six days six steps uh for days that don't suck.

SPEAKER_01 33:27

Is that the correct six steps to fewer days that suck suck suck and the daily decisions with an s dot com. And if you go to the daily decisions with an s, the dailydecisions.com forward slash inspire, you can join my positive energy club and download complimentary, that's free, worksheets, happiness worksheets, motivation worksheets, and feel good activity worksheets. They're companion to six steps to fewer days that suck, but they're standalone too.

SPEAKER_00 34:01

I love it. Thank you very much, Deborah. This this has been wonderful. And for anyone who's listening or watching, thank you again for joining us for another episode of Read and Write with Natasha. And until we meet again, ciao. Thank you for tuning in to Read and Write with Natasha. I'm your host, Natasha Times. If today's episode inspired you in any way, please take the time to review the podcast. Remember to subscribe and share this podcast with fellow book lovers. Until next time, happy reading, happy riding!